Are you still alive?

Open you eyes upon this summer blackout

I know you're out there somewhere

I wonder if you're thinking what I'm thinking

Do you ever think about you and me

and the summer nights we passed through?

They were some of the best times of my life

Do summer nights ever break your heart?

I HATE TO THINK OF YOU

I HATE THE MEMORIES

THEY ALWAYS LEAD UP TO THE PART WHERE YOU DUMPED ME

LAST WEEK YOU SENT ME A LETTER

TELLING ME THAT YOU HAVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT ME

AND HOW YOU WANT TO BE MY FRIEND

YOUR BEAUTY IS A DIEASE

A SHARP BLADE THAT KEEPS CUTTING NIGHT AFTER NIGHT

SCAR TISSUE IS STRONGER THAN NORMAL FLESH

YOU ARE TURNING ME INTO A LIVING SCAR

I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO THANK YOU OR MYSELF 

Be careful with your face

Be careful with your eyes

Be careful with what you say

You can't retract a single thing you do

Every action is true

Some people don't care about apologies

When you lose your temper

You throw in all your cards

You give them everything they need to pull you apart

Be careful with what you let show

Be careful with what you hold back and how you do it

Some people can read faces like headlines

You looked into my eyes and all you could see was jungle

There are some people that you can't get close to

You find that you cant find them

They hide themselves too well

You thought that they were your friends

You see that you were wrong

No one will pick you up

That's what they do best

They let you fall

They tell you that you're beautiful

Can't you see what they've done to you

They wrecked your beautiful face

They sold your smile

They turned you into garbage

You fell hard

I came running

It was too late

They stole the jewels from your eyes

The last time I saw you

You were a museum piece

They'll kill you with your own secrets

Take me into your heart

Swallow me whole

All the way down

Let me run wild in your dreams

Let me go and tear through you

Let me see what you're made of from the inside

Let me take hold

Let me wrap my hand around your soul

Only for a litte while

A life time isn't that long

You can't keep me out

You thought you had a choice

You thought you had a thought of your own

I think I'll destroy you and waste your time

I'll make you think I'm all there is to life

I use you up as you go down the line

Iam lust 

Sometimes I want to paint all the windows black

Somehow thinking that it will all go away

It's hard to be here

I don't know when it happened

Parts of me died

I don't know if they all died at once

Or if it was in installments

Maybe I killed them off

When I look into their eyes

I don't feel the way I used to

It's not you, you're beautiful as always

It's me, I'm dying piece by piece

Things don't seem as good as they used to

Maybe I'm growing old

Remember when someone's touch

Could send you to another world?

When it was the only thing you needed?

I don't know if I'm as stupid as I used to be

Half of life is fucking up

The other half is dealing with it

If I had tears

They would be hollow

 

The big house of love

I see the few crawling survivors

On their hands and knees going out the back door

Cut and bleeding they curl up and die

Some fools try to get back in

They try to break in the side window

They get their ass kicked and swear it's the best

It looks like a torture chamber

I don't play that shit

They can all me anything they want

I always see through

I always look at them as they crawl

They're lost in love

I'm lost in something else 

I told him so much tonight

I told him of the great longing

The endlessness that I feel

I told him things that mattered to me

And how hard it is to find things that matter

I thought I was making a lot of sense

When I saw the cold door of his eyes

I stopped talking and went back to my jungle

I feel homeless in their eyes

Surrounded by a wasteland in their embrace

Their everywhere is my nowhere

I'm tired of feeling lost and empty in their oasis

Life is not too short

There's a small part of my heart that's always sad

Part of me that walks with a slow aching step

Forever longing

The beauty of that

To be forever longing

Too much joy makes the time pass too quickly

A bit of sadness slows things down so you can see it

Makes the sun set slower

The poison of joy

They cannot imagine a beauty in sadness

They stay away

They never get past the surface

When I fall down inside I find new parts

It's like digging for soul's gold

I never want to become a stranger to the downside

That which moves me when I cannot be moved

The great longing, the great sadness

That's my inspiration

Filling the void

Filling the grave

Filling out the time card

When we're together we play tapes

You put in yours and I put in mine

We press play

We have a relationship

We can fuck

But can't look each other in the eyes

Pathetic

Dream for the future night

I should line you up and shoot you in the street

You could fall right in with the other pieces of garbage

I'm the best thing that ever happened to you

For so long I resisted, I told myself that I was wrong about you. A long time ago my hatred spoke to me in clear simple words. I saw things for what they were and it filled me with hate. To see things as they are is to hate. For a while I tried to fit into their world of love and blindness and found it to be violent and filthy. I was filled with dirt after listening to their words of lies and desperation. I became part of their losing world. I can't see how they take it year after year. Perhaps they're so numb that they don't even feel it. This morning my hatred came and filled me with light and clarity. 

Year after year your cities countinue to destroy themselves

I watch them stab themselves, use dirty needles

Cities chew you up with iron teeth

Nowhere men, nowhere women

You whore yourselves daily

You can never kill yourselves enough

Always looking to get the lastest disease

I spit on your heads

You're turning people like me into heroes

 

The world is full of creeps

Watch them crawl

Don't get too close

They'll pull you down

TAKE ME OUT OF HERE

I WANT TO FEEL MYSELF IN YOUR GRIP

I CAN'T FIND ANYTHING TO LIVE FOR

BUT DON'T LEAVE ME HERE

TO EAT DUST AND DRINK LIE FILLED WATER

I DON'T WANT THE SHALLOW MIND GRAVE

I NEED SOMETHING DEEP

TAKE ME AND DESTROY ME

BUT DON'T LEAVE ME IN THIS

Amen, good night, come here, I won't hurt you

Yes I know it's bad

But you get good at lying to yourself

She told me she didn't want to see me anymore

Then she hung up

I sat down on the bed of 100 hotel rooms

Everything got hollow and back to normal

I guess I'm free to go out and make other mistakes